where art collides philosoperontap

The butcher’s block in the kitchen lies heavy with camping equipment. Actually the butcher’s block itself is quite heavy, being as it is a large chunk of wood on wheels. Also I was applying artistic license in describing the camping equipment as weighty. In fact it is a plastic crate full of our camping cooking equipment and plastic crockery and not really that heavy. All the gear was handily put in the crate so that whenever we go away in the van all we have to do is lift and shift, so to speak. On this occasion we aren’t even going to unpack the crate. Certainly not before going. We might decide to do so once settled into the lush verdance of the Woodhall Country Park.

While I’m talking about the kitchen, which I was before moving to Woodhall Spa, it is breakfast time but I am not feeling hungry. This is because upon the return of THG from the smoke last night we had a very excellent beef stew. I’m a dab hand at making stews even though I say so myself. This particular concoction was lacking something when tasted during the cooking process but the addition of Worcestershire Sauce soon sorted that out. I even treated myself to a slice of bread and butter to mop up the gravy, it was that good.

As a result I am not, as stated, feeling hungry and am therefore going to delay breakfast until later this morning where it might then be called brunch. I did have a glass of milk and am now enjoying a cup of tea. Dunno why I tell you all this stuff. I like sitting on the sofa in the snug after breakfast, tapping away and drinking tea. On this occasion, as you know, I skipped the actual breakfast bit and have just gone straight for the tea on the sofa.

The bulk of the preparation for the trip has been done. Drinks chilling in the fridge and most things ready to go in the van. All I really need to do is throw a few items of clothing into a bag and transfer the bacon into the cool box.

I was pondering hitting the pool before going as we don’t need to set off until after lunchtime but I haven’t yet made my mind up on that one. I’ve been every day this week so it won’t hurt to miss one sesh. See how I get on with stuff this morning. I don’t like to rush things.

On a different subject did anyone see the sumo wrestling from the Albert Hall last night. I watched the first half. It was mesmerising, fascinating. The problem is ten bouts only lasted about half an hour if that and most of that was the time spent lining up in the ring standing on one leg and slapping thighs. I looked up the ticket prices. The event is sold out but if you are desperate you can still get tickets on viagogo for just under a grand. Unfortunately I can’t go (phew) because as you know we are going camping. These camping trips are great fun and not to be missed.

The life expectancy of a sumo wrestler is estimated to be between 60 and 65 years apaz. This compares with the average Japanese male’s life expectancy of 81–87 years. I’m glad I didn’t become a sumo wrestler. I’d only have just over a year to go. My birthday is in December. Same date as Donny Osmond but I think he is a year or two older than me. This year I’ll be sixty four and I’ve been thinking about a trip to the Isle of Wight next summer. Rent a cottage. Don’t want to make it a regular thing. Already been there three times. Twice by yacht and once by ferry but went sailing when I got there thanks to Adam Beaumont. While ago now. Also went up in a microlite with Danial Subhani which was a great experience. A great trip overall. I must take a look on AirBnB.

Anyway gotta go. My cup is empty and I have a day to get on with.

Ciao bebes.

…

At ten oh seven I am feeling peckish and sense that a bacon sandwich might be in the offing. I’ve sorted my gear out including finding my green Timberland lumberjack shirt, ideal for camping expeditions. I will go nicely with a warm beanie. Gotta look the part innit. 

In the shed I remembered that I was going to take my Sonos Move2 speaker so that is now all bagged up and ready to party. Not that we are a noisy lot of campers. One has to respect the calm of the countryside, the enjoyment of the outdoors of other campers. This assumes there will be other campers. To some extent you need your head examined to go camping at this time of year. It’s all very well for our pals who have motorhomes. Squeezing in to a 1971 Volkswagen T2 Bay is a little less luxurious. Much cooler though and we do have the heater which can stay plugged in.

The scene around the lake this morning is serene. No fox action to report from last night. Nowt. Not even a cat. Lakecam doesn’t pick up mice movements.

Bit of a Tref day today. THG is off to the smoke with a pal and I have some jobs to be getting on with. Prepping campervan Betty for the weekend, bit of cooking, stuff like that. Quite looking forward to it. Might even start on my “coffee” table top for the shed. My biggest issue with this one is that I am using some original stuff to decorate the table. Gig tickets, boarding passes etc. Using PVA glue doesn’t protect them very well. It’s ok when using printed copies of things as is the case with the round table top as I can easily redo them but I want my Paul McCartney ticket, for example, to be protected and to endure. Was toying with the idea of using resin but that seems complicated and I might have to settle for varnish. If anyone has any suggestions feel free to fire my way.

As I have to drop THG off at the stayshun early I am already up and dressed for breakfast. This is not normal. When there is no rush to get ready I don’t rush. This isn’t to say I just sit on my arse doing nothing but if it is doable in my pajamas as is the case when tapping in philosopherontap posts then that is ok innit.

The sky outside is quite light. I got the impression from the wireless that it was going to be cloudy. One of them didn’t listen to the other – the weather and the BBC that is. Maybe one of them didn’t look out of the window or maybe they did and it was cloudy where they were. Maybe I didn’t listen to the weather forecast properly. Wouldn’t surprise me. At all.

In the jardin d’THG one pink dahlia adds a bit of colour by the decking. That particular flower has been there a while. It has stamina. We planted loads of dahlias for Hannah & George’s wedding but I don’t think they were ready in time. At least they are now there and ready for next season. The plan is to widen the border over the winter. It is overshadowed by the beech hedge and the thought is that a wider border with plants a little further from the hedge will produce more colour. It’s a plan.

You will also want to know that for the first time this autumn I had to switch on the car rear screen demister and the trees en route to the stayshun were very much different hues of brown and rapidly losing their canopies. The summer’s easy living has been left in the rear view mirror.

A pot of tea has been made and I must get busy in the kitchen.

Been investigating log splitters. Not all the team is particularly thrilled at the idea of me buying one as, like the fruit press, it will most of the time just be sat in the potting shed or woodstore. There is an element of truth in this but since when have we let facts get in the way of impulsive purchasing decisions. The biggest problem is that I’ve left them too long to split and the logs are rock hard. Can’t budge em with axe nor wedge. There isn’t an immediate emergency as we have enough logs of the right size to keep us going but there is going to come a time when that supply runs out.

It isn’t as if we light the fire that often tbh. I’m thinking of setting it in readiness for Sunday as we have my blood and blister Ann with her chosen life partner Toby coming for a couple of nights. Their visit presents a challenge. Not their visit per se but it follows directly on from a camping weekend in Woodhall Spa with the gang which are notoriously “lively” affairs and is in turn going to be followed by a trip to Sheffield and then the Wirral. So much for a quiet life.

I’m not complaining. I’ll be pushing up daisies for long enough. Get on with it while you can. The only real issue is the need to go into my next hip hop, which is now only thirteen days away, as trim as possible. You will be happy to know that progress has been good. I’m going to try and be a good boy this weekend. See how it goze innit.

I did come up with the idea of going swimming in the outdoor pool in Jubilee Park on Saturday in Woodhall before we go for a curry. This isn’t as daft an idea as you might imagine. The water is lovely and warm and once in you are ok. It’s just the getting in and out that is the problem. You just have to be quick. THG went last year and she was the only person in the water. It was chucking it down and the lifeguard strolled up and down under an umbrella. I guess they’ve wised up and the pool now closes at noon. Got me out of that one then :).

T’others go for a long walk to build up a thirst. That ain’t currently my thing. What with the hip an all. Also these walks aren’t meant to be long. They just end up like that. Different people have different ideas on how long a walk should be. Either that or different perceptions of distance 🙂 

The Coast to Coast was a long walk. Took a fortnight to cover a couple of hundred miles. If I ever do that again I’d do it over three weeks and make it more of a pleasant stroll. There were some days where it was just an endurance exercise. Twenty three miles off road. I have no ambitions to become a commando. They wouldn’t have me anyway, what with my eyesight. I daresay they would nitpick about some other areas where I might not fit their profile. Huh, pshaw. Anyway like I said, I have no plans on joining the commandos. I’ll just stick to watching the movies.

Talking about movies this year we have opted for Odeon tickets from our bank. We have an account that lets you choose one perk. In 24/25 it was Disney+ subscription but we watched very little. Maybe nothing. I struggle to find anything on any channel I want to watch. I daresay THG will find something to go and see at the flicks. A quick look yesterday suggested we might need to wait a while.

Enuff.

…

I arrived in the pool a little late today but that turned out to be good. My fave lane which had been occupied when I initially looked through the big window  onto the poolside from the caff was free by the time I was changed. I dumped my towel and bag at the end of the lane, dropped in and began to swim. This is a real result because it meant that I could concentrate on the swimming and not have to worry about avoiding other pool users. Tbf this is never that much of a problem but being in the innermost lane removes that element of doubt and makes me a happy Tref.

I did my thirty minutes. There was only one moment when some bloke got in and was swimming uncomfortably close to my space but he either only lasted a short while in the pool or moved further away. Didn’t see. By the time I was finished I was the only person in the water. I noticed that the lifeguard was constantly walking around the outside of the pool and when I got out I mentioned this to him. He was trying to get to 20k steps. Fair play. You have to do a lot of walking to get to 20k steps.

As I was leaving the gym there was an announcement calling all staff to reception. Turns out someone was being given a presentation. Must have been his last day or simlar. They have a lot of staff there. The car park is huge. It’s a big gym but doesn’t feel like it.

Feels as if twelve forty is a good time to get in the pool. It’s not a problem for me. I don’t have much of a lunch anyway and it can wait until I get home. Usually a bit of protein and salad. Today it was a bacon sarnie. Why not eh?

Started shifting stuff from our room into one of the spare bedrooms. We are having a decor refresh. Well you do don’t you? Bit of wallpaper and a lick of paint. Some of the pictures are going, no doubt to be replaced by something new. I’ll find out when it is finished. Doesn’t do any harm. In fact it means I’ve been clearing out some of my drawers, chucking bits of paper that I wonder why I’ve kept for twenty years and realising that I’ve got a lot of old socks and tee shirts I’m unlikely to wear again and can therefore be moved on. Ruthless!

Rained overnight and the leaves have begun to fall in earnest. Interesting adjective that. The earnest leaf. Seriously folks. Those leaves are determined to descend, upon the lawn. Tis the time of year. Also the fox appeared in the front drive briefly at one fourteen ey em. Set off the floodlights and turned around and went back in the direction from whence he came which on this occasion was next door’s garden. I’ll check the lake cam later obvs.

It’s a shame the lake cam wifi range is not sufficient for me to download its media from the house. I can wake it up using bluetooth but the wifi is a bit sluggish. Oo rewind I’ve just tried and I’ve managed to pick up three “motions” so to speak. Maybe the rain improves the signal! It’s a cat though, not a fox and it came variously between a quarter to seven and five past – not long after I’d been downstairs to make the tea. Not really wildlife but still interesting I suppose. You could see it was raining.

Still waiting for that giraffe, wildebeest or lion. Any one of those would do although we would have to stay inside and out of the way if it was a lion. It would hit the news big time. “Lion caught on camera at local lake”. It is really why they invented the lake cam. Its main purpose in life. I’m not sure I would like all the attention. Not many people know about the lake and the publicity would almost certainly attract more visitors with the accompanying disruption and invasion of privacy. Litter, fires, over fishing. Overnight camping even. That kind of thing. 

Brian would be distraught. He might even be forced to leave to find a quieter spot, if the lion hadn’t already “got” him. If the crowds don’t drive him away the over fishing certainly might. Anyway it isn’t a problem, yet. If a lion did come I might have to keep quiet about it although that would be difficult, especially if I was in the shed at the time. I don’t have many provisions in the shed. Just a few packets of crisps and some g&t in the fridge. Man cannot live on crisps and g&t alone. Even if I did try I would soon be driven outside by the need to visit the loo and that would be dangerous with the lion there. Remember Albert and the Lion.

Lets face it there would probably already be an ongoing search for an escaped lion if he rocked up in our back garden. Where he would have escaped from I have no idea. A travelling circus maybe. Nellie did the same thing. Dunno if circuses have lions nowadays. Not v politically correct is it? The chances of a modern day Nellie the elephant appearing in our garden are remote in the extreme. Wouldn’t be able to fit through the gap in the hedge, obvs.

I am reluctant to do it but there could come a day when I might have to erect a PRIVATE KEEP OUT sign at the lake. This is something I don’t really want to have to do as the nice thing about the lake is the minimal signs of human interference. The rescue boat, jetty, Danger Deep Water sign and lifebelt station are pretty unobtrusive especially when you consider the vast expanse of open water of the lake itself.

One of these days I might see if I can walk around the circumference. Would probs need a packup. Have a picnic lunch when I reach the deck maybs. It is about half way around. Be nice to stop and chat with Brian. See how he is getting on. Share some wildlife stories. That kind of thing.

Anyway I must go. Things to do, leaves to gather.

…

Set off early for my daily swim as I wanted to swing by Fosters to buy some meat. However there were no handy parking spots and some unneighbourly individual had parked across two spaces. I went around the block once to see if anywhere freed but but it didn’t so I carried on to Total Fitness and got there fifteen minutes earlier than planned.

The downside of this is that it is busier than I like it but in reality it was ok when I arrived. Just a couple of walkers and two swimmers, one of whose technique was so bad that she clearly wasn’t going to be in the water for very long. By the time I got changed she had gone but was replaced by a swimmer and three walkers, two of whom got in at the same time as me.

If you have never seen it, walking in the water is basically resistance walking and it is typically done by people recovering from illnesses or operations (eg me though I ain’t done it meself) or those who are desperately out of condition and for who walking in the pool is a sensible form of exercise.

My fave inside lane was already taken by someone we might consider to be a pro. This I don’t mind. She ploughed up and down and only got out five minutes before me. The lane next to her, the second best spot and one which allows you to easily slip into the best lane once it empties was taken by a walker. Sokay. I set off and worked around the walkers, eventually ending up in the second best spot once the walker had left the pool for the spa. 

The pro and I ploughed our furrows without interruption until some bloke got in and set off in her lane. This is v poor etiquette. Moreover he stopped for a rest after every length and was soon doing the same in my lane. Worraknob. Fortunately he didn’t stay the pace and left me and the pro in peace. After the pro had finished her quota she was replaced by a couple of ladies of a certain pace and it was with an element of relief that I completed my thirty mins and exited the water. 

Didn’t have time to hit the spa today. A decision helped by the fact that it was a lot fuller than is usual at that time of day. The spa users are normally a mix of body types. Those with sculptured frames who are just relaxing after a session in the gym and those, less toned individuals for whom the gym is a staircase too far but are pleased to be able to enjoy the healthgiving properties of the hot tub. I am somewhere in between. I’m not sure there is a pattern of pool and spa usage around which I can base my visit times. I guess a twelve fifteen arrival is as good as any.

Home now to find that THG (worrawoman) had already applied some primer to the new bits of woodwork that joiner Mark had fitted. Specifically to the bottom of the garage door. He does a good job. That’s all the external woodworking jobs done now in time for the onset of winter. Bring it on…

One other thing I did this morning, and this might strike a chord with some of you, is that I spent some time sorting out my screw collection. There is further work to do but good progress is being made. A bloke needs his screws to be tidy and orderly. It needs to be easy to find the right screw for the job. Ditto nails although I don’t use nails that often but I have a wide variety of them collected over forty or more years of adulting.

In 2025 I invested in a nut and bolt calibrating “tool”. It’s really a plastic card with lots of graded holes and slots which now that I think of it might come in handy for sorting my nails. It even helps you measure thread spacing. What’s not to like?

The workshop turns out to be a v cosy spot to spend time. It has excellent insulation and a small wall mounted panel heater that quickly brings the space up to a comfortable working temperature. The wifi access is much poorer than I had expected and this is something that will need working on. Either move the kitchen hotspot or stick a power line extension in. Not sure I have the mounting bracket for the hotspot which might be non optimal but lets see how we get on.

Bit les mis out there. Heating is on. The heat is on. Great weekend in London Town and now back in the shire. Back to reality. Routine. Humdrum existence. Not that I particularly have a routine, outside the usual stuff like get out of bed, have breakfast, brush teeth etc. Dunno if having no routine is good or not. Also when I say mis it isn’t really mis. Ok it is cloudy and maybe even drizzly but why should we call that miserable? It’s life, Jim, as we know it. The changing of the seasons. I like weather.

Over the weekend we caught the Northern line twice on both Saturday and Sunday. Balham and back. Bal ham. Don’t know about you but sometimes when I am on the tube I while away the time by commenting on the stations we pass through. Clapham Common as muck for example. Stock well. Gotta keep those kitchen cupboards filled, for a rainy day. Today is rainy and I expect the good residents of Stock well will be well prepared. The well prepared of Stock well. I daresay there are other London underground stations worthy of comment or observation but those are the two that spring to mind.

We now have a week of being sensible until the next outing which is a campervan trip to Woodhall Spa. This trip will be all about layers. Warmth. Possibly even gloves although I rarely have to resort to gloves at this time of year. That comes with the fierce temperature drops of January and February when the east wind blows across from the Ural mountains and forces us to huddle around the fireplace. Even that weather can only be described as bad if you are unprepared.

Operations now moved to the shed which is beautifully warm as I forgot to switch the heating off last night when I returned to the house and the company of the lovely THG. No fox action to report, at least from the side of the lake. It did momentarily appear in the front drive at oh two thirty three but seemed to change its mind when the floodlights came on and turned around and left. I download any relevant lakeside vids when I get to the shed as the hotspot doesn’t extend as far as the house. Sfine.

Not having a routine I am now sitting here wondering what to do. I leave for the pool at around noon (ok that is a weekday routine) so have some time to fill. I do need to make a start on the new tabletop for the shed. I have a couple of wooden crates on which is positioned a tabletop made out of two bits of scaffold planks glued together. The plan has always been to stick things on the scaffold planks to add a bit of interest. I have a load of things ready to stick. Stuff like old gig tickets, boarding passes, interesting postcards etc. The gig tix and boarding passes will be fairly old as it’s all done on your phone these days.

One of the wooden crates is filled with packets of pretzels and crisps purloined from the first class lounge at Kings Cross station. They will eventually be consumed but not at the mo. When I hit my fighting weight. Hopefully before their use by date. The plan with the crates is to stencil something onto them but don’t know what yet. Obvs I’ll let you know when I know.

…

Had a couple of slices of ham and two tomatoes flunch washed down with a glass of h2o. On the way back from Total Fitness I stopped by Newland Pharmacy to pick up a prescription. Had a sms from the NHS over the weekend to say it was ready. No it wasn’t. Come back after 4pm. That’s the second time this has happened.

At TF I popped into the steam room, something I don’t often do. Was in a short while on my own quite enjoying being there when a couple of women came in and started talking about tv shows. The inane chatter drove me out and into the shower.

V pleasant boozy lunch in Bal ham, gateway to the south. Joint family job. Davieses and Bradshaws. I am v fortunate that THG offered to share the driving. I drove to Newark Northgate and she is driving back. I am therefore now sipping away quietly at an Ellers Farm Distillery Original North Yorkshire gin watered down just a little by a low calorie tonic water. Not too much yanow. Just a lidlbit.

I’m sure many of you enjoy a boozy lunch once in a while. Not too often otherwise it isn’t a treat. The thing about a boozy ;lunch is that you have to keep going otherwise you nod off. Life is too short to nod off. Although I recall the time when Joe and I went to Nawlins on a bit of a boys trip. We flew in to Atlanta which was not ideal but it was the only airport we could get BA first with Avios so I figured it was worth the overnight stay to enjoy the benefits of first class including the Concorde lounge which if you’ve never bene is definitely worth visiting. Anyway one we had taken off Joe joined me for an extremely pleasant boozy lunch which we ended with some desert wine or simlar. I fell asleep but Joe carried on and polished off the bottle. When we arrived in Atlanta we checked in to a Hampton by Hilton near the aeroporto and hit the bar to finish off the evening. Joe was on the soft drinks which I didn’t understand until he told me that he had finished the bottle. I said he should have had a snooze but his response was that he might never fly first class again so it was completely understandable. Never say never though.As a result the hangover hit him when we got to the hotel. Hey…

The brain is somewhat sluggish this morning. The morning after our Joe and someday to be our Lucy’s engagement bash in Balham (gateway to the south). Not helped by not eating anything. On the way out to Balham I tried to use my room key to get through the barrier. That was before the party had even started! This morning I couldn’t get in the lift because the room key I thought I had in my pocket turned out to be my oyster card. Fortunately THG was able to leap into action with her key and up we went. Except we didn’t. We went up one floor and then back down to lobby level. Then the lift started up again. Someone had pressed the button to call it. Fortunately that person was on the fourth floor which is where we wanted to be. What an adventurous life we lead.

Now sat in the lobby watching the world go by whilst THG hits the shops. We are in Angel. The hotel is v convenient for Kings Cross and also, as it happens, Balham. Just jump on the northern line. Thirteen stops and you are there. I was born just around the corner on the Liverpool Road. On a Saturday, fwiw.

The hotel is full, as you might imagine, of tourists. Nary a word of the local tongue to be heard. Even amongst the American visitors. Mind you I’m not sure I could understand a lot of what the born and bred (and buttered) Londoner says anyway these days. Twill be a sad day when cockney rhyming slang disappears into the history books. Lend us a monkey.

The number 214, single decker bus has just rolled by closely followed by the 205 which has an upper deck and is thus far superior as long as the front seat is free. Neither stopped at the bus stop opposite the hotel as it is currently out of use due to road works. It’s stop PN Penton Street/Chapel Market if the info is useful to you. Don’t plan your journey based on getting on or off at this stop. I did yesterday when coming from Kings Cross and had to get off a stop earlier. How annoying eh?

Couple of New Orleans Saints fans sat in the lobby. Well she is. I think his shirt says SF. Don’t want to stare to much to see what team it is. San Francisco something or other obvs. I’d say, based on a quick trawl of tinterweb because these things are important, it was the 49ers. 

Have a good couple of hours to kill before we have to set off for our lunch date with Lucy’s mum and dad, the young couple, and me blood and blister Sue. There ya go. Lapsing into the vernacular. Always ‘appens when you return to your roots dannit. Although I was born here my roots are really in Wales and, actually, the Isle of Man where I spent my formative years. Dad, as the Director of Education, was instrumental in introducing Manx language lessons to primary schools on the island. Was after I’d left home so I didn’t benefit from the larnin but a nice legacy to commemorate dad’s time there.

Bloke called Hugo just sat down opposite. I assume that is his name as it is emblazoned large on the front of his shirt. Doesn’t look like a Hugo. More an Ahmed I’d have said but who am I to say. People give their children the most unlikely names. I think Moonbase Zappa changed his by deed poll. Don’t blame him. If you aren’t comfortable in your own skin sort it out. My own name is Huw Trefor Davies so not so far off being a Hugo. Probably wouldn’t have sounded right in Dolgellau in the 1960s. Ble mae Hugo heddiw? I am ok being Huw Trefor. My friends call me Tref.

In Wales it was quite common to use Trefor as a middle name. Well relatively common, ish. You would be called by both names – Huw Trefor, Robert Trefor, John Trefor etc. Not many people with the name Trefor nowadays. I started a Facebook group just for people called Trefor. It has 3 or 4 members. I messaged the 60 or so Trefors on Facebook but few of them were excited enough at the prospect to want to join the group. Needless to say it has very few posts. Perhaps that is the problem. Sokay. You run things up the flagpole, see who salutes and move on if it doesn’t work.

An hour until checkout. I suppose I should head up to the room and bring down the bags. THG is still somewhere out there in the great melting pot that is Angel Islington. All life is here.

I am now three stays away from reaching gold status for next year with Hilton Honors. This ain’t as good as it sounds because I am currently diamond but gold is fine. Building up the points for a big holiday somewhere sometime. We are unlikely to use a Hilton for our far east trip next year because a big trip like that merits staying in hotels that do justice to the location. However I can envisage a week on points in somewhere like Malta or maybe another mediterranean destination. Likely to be 2027 now. Amazingly 2026 is already looking busy and we haven’t planned any Isle of Man trips yet which is a must.

I think that’ll do for now. The cobwebs have been brushed away and I am able to see more clearly.

Ciao amigos. Hasta la vista.

Yay it’s the weekend. Time for a lie in. No nine o’clock meeting. Who on earth organises nine o’clock meetings? Busy people, sadists and those from a different time zone who can’t work out basic maths. Not on a Saturday, Shirley. THG will be up and out of the house by nine mind you. Park Run ninety one. Impressivo. I’ll be up as well really. 

I am informed that it is misty out there. Time of year innit. You knew that. Mellow, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera. Heating not on yet though. Wear a thicker jumper. Good word, jumper. Interesting origin fwiw. Just looked it up. 

I ditched the shorts a week or two ago. There was a bloke in shorts and tshirt at the Broadbent Theatre last night. Ard. Either that or a nutter. I did have to take my jumper off. They had the heating on. Ditto my love and peace leather jacket. Overkill. We had H7 and H8. Backrow aisle seats nearest the exit for a quick getaway. This is important at the Broadbent Theatre because the carpark, which is a small field just up the road, gets rammed and it takes ages to get out so getting there first is a must. It’s also important to reverse in to your spot otherwise it takes even longer to escape as no quarter is given by other theatregoers when it comes to needing space to reverse out and manoeuvre. You will recognise the sort from your visits to garden centre cafes on Sunday afternoons.

On this occasion we were first into the field. Despite my limited mobility the urgency of the task drove me on. We almost needn’t have bothered. Alan the volunteer car park attendant had double parked everyone. It’s the only way to get all the cars in despite it being a tiny theatre. To give you an idea, our row H was the last row on our side of the aisle and numbered twelve closely packed seats. You can work out the capacity. It’s a lovely little gaff. Quaint. Should be supported. We do. Made Alan’s name up. I think he did get namechecked by the announcer but I didn’t register it, not realising that he would be featured in this post the next morning.

Anyway, back in the car park, our row was double parked and we were almost at the end of it which did not bode well. Fortunately the person who had stuck his Skoda in front of us did not do it very effectively and there was just enough room to squeeze through with just inches either side. The problem was turning at the end. I didn’t want to scrape the vw campervan parked opposite (obvs) but a couple of high pressure manoeuvres under the ‘patient’ glares of theatregoers returning to their own sensible cars and we were through. My only real problem is that I have no idea where the front of THG’s little Peugeot 208 is so turning in tight spaces brings with it an element of uncertainty. Improbability. Had we been in my, long since sold, land rover defender it would have been an impossible job despite the 360 degree cameras. We were third or fourth out of the car park and sped away from Wickenby in a jubilant mood. I like driving down those back lanes in the dark.

We always enjoy our night out at the Broadbent Theatre. They have a little bar that they wheel to the front where folk purchase drinks of their choice. At the interval someone sells ice cream also down the front which results in a longish but orderly queue. I refrain from the consumption of any liquids largely because the gents toilet is to the right at the front and offers no access possibilities during a show. Whilst I have in the past had an ice cream my present regime discourages the consumption of such foodstuffs. Quite right too.

Today sees us leaving Lincolnshire’s rural theatreland in our rear view mirrors as we head south for a party in the bright lights, big city. On the train, not THG’s car.

Ciao bebes. There is breakfast to consume.

No fox news to report nor venison. Squirrels and pigeons but they are not worth reporting unless I catch one of the buggers red handed despoiling the infrastructure around the lake.

Mark the joiner is back this morning for hopefully his last day of activity, apart from the fixing of some floorboards upstairs but that needs planning as the carpet will have to be taken up. THG has gone to the gym so I am in the shed “doing stuff”. I do have to nip out to buy flooring for the utility room which I will do a bit later as I also have to pop to Hemswell Court to pick up a pair of secateurs left there after Hannah & George’s wedding and to Hackthorne to pick up my framed SOS wafer (if you know you know). My other jobs include putting away the pickled onions I put in jars yesterday which is hardly a job tbh but needs doing  and to marinade a couple of chichen breasts for tonight’s tea. You will forgive me if I occasionally slip into the Liverpudlian vernacular. I am married to a scouser after all. The latter needs a decision on the marinade which takes time obvs. Swat the www is for.

For some reason I woke up at midnight last night which actually turned out to be fortuitous as I had planned to book reward flights on BA this morning and the nearer to midnight you do it the better your chance of getting the flights you want. It turned out that when releasing reward flights BA do it at midnight GMT which was 1am BST. I repeated the process at 1am and successfully got my tix. The flight has the Club World Suites. The cognoscenti amongst you will know that this is important. With the old setup you really had to get first class tickets if at all possible but BA are doing fewer and fewer of these. The Club Suites are as good as the old first class so I’m happy enough. Just have to wait a couple of weeks to add the return leg before I can properly put together a schedule. Am looking at ‘nam, as they say. Or at least they used to. I never have. Until just now.

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Quite a bit of work to be done under shed decking. Really just putting off the day until it will need renewing. Mark was quite scathing about whoever put it in but TBH it has probs been there for over 20 years so we have had good wear out of it. In fact when mentioning this to Mark he said he just found an empty crisp packet with a 2003 sell by date. 

Got to Hemswell and there was “nobody in today”. Ah well. Called in at Forge Arts in Hackthorne. They were shut because there was “something wrong with the door lock”. Ah well. Shit happens. Then on to Carpetrite. They didn’t have the exact same flooring in the 2m width so I got the nearest match. I guess that counts as a result considering the other errand (errant) successes or lack of. 

Bit of a bonus in that I swung by Fosters on the way home and picked up a wodge of streaky bacon which will go nicely in the chicken and avocado salad tonight. Funnily enough I had chicken salad after golf last night! No avo though. It was dark by the time we finished playing so the season is rapidly drawing to a close. Some of the lads struggle to get there earlier than 3.30pm and as soon as the clocks change we would need to be getting out at 10am really. I’ll be out of action until Christmas anyway because of my post hip hop recovery period. Not completely out of action but definitely out of sporting action.

The meadow has been mown. THG uttered these words when standing at the sink looking out of the kitchen window. I thought I’d capture the moment. Domestic life in the twenty first century. Did it the other day when mowing the lawn. 

She was at the sink to fill the kettle to make the tea and coffee. We need a new kettle cos this one doesn’t switch itself off anymore. Still boils water ok though. You just have to keep an eye on it. No different to life a hundred years ago when you had to stick the kettle on the range and watch it boil. When did they stop using ranges? A hundred years ago is not far off the mark but you will want to know that cast iron range production practically ground to a halt during WW2 when they wanted to use the manufacturing plants for other purposes. Presumably there was a shortage of steel as well.

You had to be careful picking up the kettle from the range. The handle would be v hot. Use a cloth. You’d only forget the once. My grandmother’s cottage had the outline of a range in her small living room. It would have been the kitchen when they built the cottage. My grandfather, who was a miner, when he got home from work would have his bath on the floor in front of the range. They also had a cupboard under the stairs which was the larder and where they would shelter during air raids.

Eventually they built a small lean to extension which housed the kitchen and connected the house to what had been the outside privy. No central heating. It was bloody cold when you had to go to the loo in the morning.

The pit where my grandfather worked was over the road. Blaenhirwaun. My great grandfather on the maternal side, John Lewis, was the mining engineer who managed the colliery and built two cottages directly opposite. When he retired the presented him with an engraved miners lamp and a silver tea set which are now in the possession of my sisters.

I digress. I don’t know what I was going to say anyway. Yes I do. I started this post by clicking on the AI “generate document” icon and said “write a diary entry”. It did. I guess it meant well. It will never be me although I daresay the day is not far off when it could deceive people into believing it was me. One thing that caught me by surprise was the fact that it used Lexend font. Never eard of it. Had to revert back to Arial which I have used for decades but only because it is better than Courier or Times New Roman. I am a creature of habit, obvs.

No wildlife to be seen yet but I will update you when I’ve taken a look on the lakecam.

Today is when I begin the pickling process. I’ve been assembling the necessary tools and ingredients and needed THG to tell me where we kept the kilner jars which are now found. The only other thing I need is one more litre of malt vinegar and some fresh chillies but I don’t need them until tomorrow. Today is peeling the shallots day and then the salting process. I found some muscovado sugar which will do instead of whatever the recipe recommends. They all offer slight mods on a basic formula.

One year I did experiment with using different vinegars; white wine and sherry for example, or it might have been cider but I’m not sure I could tell the difference in the end product, particularly as I didn’t label the jars. Balsamic was one of the vinegars I think. I reckon peeling the onions will take most of the morning. There are a lot of them. If anyone wants to swing by to help then they would be v welcome but I understand why you might all be busy doing other things 🙂 

Back in Lincoln after a great time golfing in Norfolk. Hurricane Amy was brushed off as a mere breeze by a determined bunch of golfers hell bent on getting round the course. I used the same ball for the whole round despite Amy’s efforts to blow it off course.  

At home Amy left her calling card at the lake in the guise of a tree that she had viciously brought down. You can see from the photos that Brian experienced a very near miss. My god it was a close thing for the lad, who didn’t flinch and just carried on doing what he loves the most. I’m sure I’ll get to hear all about it when next we speak.

Whilst I was away, the night time lake visitations continued. It is interesting to observe that none of the wild creatures have been seen drinking any water. You would think this was one of the reasons for being there. It certainly is the case in Africa where during periods of drought a miscellany of wildlife is seen to congregate at water holes. Perhaps the back gardens of Lincoln abound with rivers and lakes.

Forgot to mention it the other day, what with all the hullabaloo with the fox, but Brian mentioned that he saw a submarine in the lake. Only the periscope mind you but when it comes to things in lakes Brian knows his stuff. After all, he spends all his time there. Brian is a man of few words and for him to come out with such a statement should be considered significant. Moreover as a straight talking gnome of integrity his remark has to be taken seriously.

Now there is a scenario where it wasn’t a submarine and Bri was mistaken but I’ve racked my brains to try and come up with anything that might look like a periscope but is something else and I’ve drawn a blank. I suppose it could just have been someone snorkelling but in that case Brian would have seen a body attached to the “periscope”, surely? Doesn’t sound right does it? The lake is deep enough for a sub. In parts it is as deep as Loch Ness which, as you know, is big enough to hide a monster. I’m sticking with sub.

It’s going to be interesting to get Brian’s insights into lake related matters. His gnome’s eye view will nicely complement the evidence of the lake cam. Enhance it even. For example the lake cam doesn’t capture weather conditions. Wind whipping up white tops on the water. Storms a brewing. I draw the line at tsunamis. I wouldn’t expect Brian to hang around after a tsunami warning. We major on health and safety at the lake.

I recall our hotel in Ao Nang in Thailand had a tsunami warning sign right outside. On the prom. Fortunately no tsunami was forthcoming but it was somewhat sobering. We weren’t on the top floor (there were only two) which with hindsight we should have requested and we were quite near the beach. I think the presence of the sign was sufficient warning. At the first sign of a tsunami we would have hot tailed it to high ground. I think as I recall I did ask to move up a floor but they were fully booked so no go. There was a nice pool at that hotel, fwiw.

I might look at putting in place another lakeside sign. Tsunami warning. The issue here is proportionality. I don’t want too many man made structures around what after all is a natural feature in the landscape. Perhaps I could paint it on a rock. Maybe a bird hide would work. Discrete. Blends in. Somewhere we could sit patiently and watch birds flutter in to land. Migrating egrets or simlar. Ducks. Get the binocs out. I must bring the binocs to the shed. My Collins bird recognition book is already here, somewhere.

I did want to put a bust of Zeus on a plinth in the undergrowth surrounding the lake. I’ve been looking for a Greek statue for a while and found one in the caff at Hemswell Antiques Centre. However, for some reason THG objected. Would have been very discrete and I thought the price point of £650 (including the plinth) was very reasonable. We married men (of thirty seven years) do accept that she and I are a team and the opinion of our chosen life partner counts. It’s not as if I could sneak it in and see if she notices. “That Greek statue? Oh it’s been there for ages”. This old thing 🙂