where art collides philosoperontap

Dark out there. Orrible. Storm someone or other making itself known. It’s an Italian name and I couldn’t tell if it was a signor or a signora. If it was storm Brian I’d know. Mind you anything goes these days when it comes to names. I am tucked up cosily in  bed. Lots of travel disruption in the news. On the news? Stay put if I were you, unless you are on the way to some tropical paradise somewhere near the equator. Good luck with your travels and don’t forget your swimming trunks. Have a pina colada for me.

Pleased to tell you that the 06:10 from Humberside Airport to Amsterdam got away more or less on time. I just looked. Not used Humberside for some years. It’s only useful for flying to Amsterdam and the flights are expensive. Plus I don’t like Schipol. It’s too big and the security queues are notoriously long unless you have “status” or a business class ticket. I have none of the former and it’s a total waste of money flying business class when you are in the air for less than an hour. By the time the fasten seat belts light goes off it’s almost time for it to go back on again.

We did have a booking there once on a trip back from Antwerp. In between lockdowns in a freezing cold February we decided to have a night out with @Remco and stayed at the Waldorf Astoria which was v nice fair play.  The next day, due to the wrath of hurricane Norma (might have been Eunice), our flight was cancelled and we were left facing the prospect of two more nights in Amsterdam. The winds had also led to shutdown of the trains. Now ordinarily this wouldn’t have been too much of an issue. Amsterdam is not a bad place to be stranded but this was February and it was bloody cold. Not conducive to being a tourist. To cut a long story short we managed to get the last two seats on one of the few flights going to London and eight hours later we were on our way. 

THG’s bag, however, wasn’t with us. It did eventually make its way back to Humberside, the original destination on the luggage tag. Moreover we had to stop the night at the Paddington Hilton which the cognoscenti amongst you will know is pretty shite. She got the case back a few days later and in the meantime, thanks to some filthy disease ridden passengers stranded at Schipol, we went down with Covid. The glamour of airline travel eh?

It is forecast to chuck it down all day here with a suggestion of snow tonight. The bigger issue is what the weather will be like for THG’s 100th Park Run, tomorrow. Fingers crossed it isn’t cancelled. Looking borderline at the mo but runners are tough hombres. What’s a bit of weather? It won’t be particularly nice for running whatever happens. In the meantime she has gone to the pool. Urgh.

In the meantime although we lost the front nine I came out ahead of the game in last night’s (virtual) golf by winning the longest drive competition. We played Augusta although for copyright reasons they had to call it “Georgia” or similar. Texas scramble format with a team of two and a team of three meant that we actually managed nine holes. Last time, at Pebble Beach, and with eight of us playing we only managed three holes in two hours! 

I must away. There is avocado to smash, sourdough to toast and bacon to cook. Man cannot live on granola alone and we haven’t got any left anyway.

Ciao amigos.

…

In other news the ice has nearly gone from the lake and the currently empty trug where I chuck recycling stuff from the shed before moving it to the brown bin in the front garden has over an inch of water in it from the overnight deluge. The wind must also have been fierce as the small black plastic plant crate has moved from its previous upside down position by the lake to a spot on the lawn a good eight or nine metres away just out of view of the lake cam. There is no video footage to suggest that an animal was involved even though the fox has form in this respect.

…

Had the news on when driving home from the pool. Rarely switch it on as it is mostly bad news. I was amazed to find out how much of the country has been hit by the snow and bad weather. I guess that fits with the Beeb’s definition of bad news and so they gave it coverage. We seem to have avoided it here, apart from the movement of the small black plastic plant crate that is.

If you are snowbound I’d advise lighting the log fire, easing into a nice single malt and waiting until spring.

Wanted to create an anagram of a happy birthday message for someone so asked Gemini to crack on and sort it. Gave me a few options, one of which I selected but something told me to check it and, blow me down, it was wrong. It did use some if not all of the letters in said phrase but had chucked in some extras to make the anagram sound right. Shame really as it was a good idea and the person receiving the card would have had fun working it out. Maybs. I used to occasionally send people messages in hex. Depended on who the recipient was as to whether they got it or not. The things we do eh?

All there is in the diary today is “pruning” at 2pm. 2pm is a random time but the apple trees and grapevine do need doing. Before the end of February. At some point the old pear tree is going to have to come down before it falls over of its own accord. I was actually pondering as I lay awake last night whether to allocate a day in the week for doing this sort of thing generally. Yanow, jobs in the garden, around the house etc. Need to get the raised beds built and the compost heap behind the greenhouse. I daresay other jobs will appear on the list. Thursday is nominally that day as it is the one where THG takes a break from weight lifting/running/swimming/cycling/etc and it can be handy to have an extra pair of hands around for this sort of thing.

These jobs are a lot more doable since hiphop2. Progress continues to be good and this morning I am going to attempt to put a sock on my left foot without the need for an artificial aid. See how it goze.

The walk to the shed this morning was v precarious. Icy footpath. I walked on the grass instead. Us shed dwellers are v safety conscious. The deck is also like an ice rink but there was no getting around that one so I was very careful. Could sling some salt down I suppose. I think we may still have the bag I picked up from the Kracow salt mine. It’s grey salt and never looked appetising enough to use for culinary purposes even though it was probably fine.

I’m happy that we have had a slice of winter but don’t feel the need for anymore sub zero temperatures. You can understand why people shoot off to da Caribbean at this time of year. I did look and there are reward flights available but we have too much going on. Maybe next January.

…

Successful sock experiment btw. We move on…

Back in the pool today for the first time since before hiphop2. That’ll be 10 or 11 weeks. Was ok. Did 20 mins plus some spa and steam room time. Didn’t want to overdo it on my first day back. I left home at around noon and was in the pool at twenty five past. No rush. Car park was rammed which didn’t fill me with much joy and initially there were quite a few people in the water. However after five minutes most of them got out leaving me with position A nearest the lane divider in the middle of the pool which means undisturbed lane ploughing.

The funny thing was I had to take my sock puller-onner contraption with me. I’d forgotten that I’d have to get dressed again after the swim, including putting my socks on. I can do my right one but not the left one yet although tbf I haven’t actually tried. Praps I’ll have a go tomorrow.

On the way back into town I pulled into the Damons carpark for a shufty. It looked as if Damons, a local Americun restaurant, had closed its doors and been replaced by a golf simulator company. However there was nowt online to support this. Turns out it is still there but the golf place branding is the only one visible from the road. Schoolboy error really.

Heavy overnight snow fell at the lake. A lone fox trotted by at ten twenty six but soon called pickings slim and moved on. Bears remained firmly in their snow caves. We won’t see them before spring. The low sun, at its coldest setting, isn’t designed to warm up the countryside.

This is effectively the start of 2026. Yes it is already the fifth of January but those first few days were really just a hangover from 2025. THG has gone off to the gym on her bike for a spot of weight training. One tough mudder. I am trying to get my brain into gear to do some work this morning. This ain’t as easy as it sounds after a month celebrating the birth of Christ/midwinter pagan festival/call it what you like.

The shed is warm but I also have season appropriate clothing in the guise of a heavy flannel lumberjack type shirt and my v cozy Himalayan woolly jumper. It has actually become a lovely crisp sunny morning. Still v cold out obvs. 

I’m also going to reactivate my gym membership today and perhaps go for a swim this pm. I can do this via the Total Fitness app which I was initially reluctant to install as it gets terrible reviews. In fact when I logged onto it this morning an Android message came up telling me there was a bug in the app and that I should clear the cache! Tbh all I want to do is rock up, swim, jacuzzi and head home so doubt I’ll be using the app for much. I was able to add my Amex card to the app so that is an improvement on my previous payment method of Tesco Clubcard. I’m pretty sure they said they didn’t take Amex when I first signed up.

In other news I finally got around to deleting the Anne’s Vans Facebook page. We move on……

fox reappeared at 15:06. Of course I forgot to press the record button on the camera! Finally it visited again at 21:52.

The decs are coming down. The tree has been stripped and has moved from its position of pride in the corner of the front room to be dumped unceremoniously next to the woodpile at the bottom of the garden, its entire purpose in life fulfilled. Over. The Christmas cards have been collected together to be stored ready to be put out next year to make people think we have lots of friends :))

We are happy to move on. Get life back to a normal footing. I will regain possession of the workshop currently rammed with the boxes and crates that are used to store the Christmas decs, there are many, dumped there for convenience in the middle of December rather than have the faff of putting them back on their high shelves in the garage. The high shelves will soon be full again and the workshop freed up for more projects.

The Sunday Service on Radio 4 is proving to be satisfactory. Some quality traditional choral work with an interesting historical insert about an old bible. The talkie bits have the right dulcet presentation tones. 

It is my turn to make the tea but it’s norrapnin as THG is away having been on the lash in London with Hannah last night. Importance of Being Earnest. Don’t get me wrong. I’m going to have a cuppa but it will wait until I finally drag meself out of bed for which there is no rush. I’ll take my turn tomorrow instead. 

I’m gonna see if we have a tin of beans in the cupboard. Feels that a hot breakfast is the appropriate choice on this very cold winter morning. The lake will be covered in deep ice and should be safe for skating although I don’t allow it. Don’t want the faff of having to respond to cries for help from skaters who may have discovered a thin section and fallen through. Oops. We live in such a litigious world yanow. The house is warm. 

One thing I picked up on the Sunday Service is that this year is the quincentenary of the publication of William Tyndale’s translation of the New Testament into English. The vernacular of the poor. Gosh. The lad died for his trouble. “He died that we may see the light for ourselves”.

I find religious history very interesting. People got/get very hot under the collar about slight differences in interpretation of things biblical. Infant or adult baptism for example or whether you had to be a true believer in order to get into heaven or would God forgive you at the last minute if he thought you were an ok person anyway. Old Tyndale was topped because the establishment wanted complete control over the minds of the populace and giving them the power to read all about it in their own language instead of latin gibberish didn’t impress. 

Attitudes had changed nobbut a few decades later when in 1588 bish William Morgan published the first Welsh version of the bible. The Act of Union of 1536 had mandated English for all official activities. Most Welsh only spoke Welsh and QE One was worried that the Welsh peasantry being unable to follow her English language Protestant angle on religion and historically being staunchly catholic in their outlook (whodathunk) might rise up against it and her. There is something poetic about the concept of people protesting against protestantism.

The side benefit of the Bible being printed in Welsh was that it effectively saved the language from extinction by standardising its written form and eventually encouraged a huge percentage of the population to learn to read and write. Diolch yn fawr William Morgan.

After yesterday’s positive glut there is no fox action to report this morning.  Gotta go. The kitchen needs tidying up before THG gets back and I have to repair the clothes airer in the utility room. The cord/rope broke yesterday. It is Sunday the 4th January 2026. January the Fourth be with you.

Up early ish to set the fire whilst cooking a sausage sarnie. Just the one sausage as that is all there was left but one is enough. Split in two down the middle to finish off on the inside before slapping on a single slice of buttered bread with HP sauce. Wash down with a glass of milk and hey presto, set up for the day.

I now need to go to the bottom of the garden to see if I can find some intermediate sized bits of wood. We burnt most of them over the holiday and most of the ones accessible on the top of the pile are on the big side. Need a log splitter really. They are too hard for the axe. The lesson there is chop early but they were too long anyway and we had to wait until Tom the Tree Man came to do his annual hedge trim. My chainsaw needs servicing/sorting out and It’s a dodgy bit of kit to use anyway so I haven’t rushed to doing that.

Fire now blazing in the grate. Easy once you have the knack. When I were a kid in Wales I remember mam or dad holding newspaper over the fireplace to encourage a draught. In those days it was coal and harder to get going. Mam used to lie in front of the fire once it had got to temperature. We didn’t have a fire in the Isle of Man. Don’t think I’d want a house without a fireplace.

The streets of Lincoln are quiet this morning. Bleary eyed citizens not fully up and running after their New Year’s Eve antics. Doesn’t feel as if there is the need to rush anyway. THG on the other hand is in her Pink Ladies gear and about to hit the streets running. Just a quick 5k. Worrawoman.

We are off to see the Imps play Huddersfield at three – probs set off just after two. Need to wrap up warm innit. The mighty Imps are second in the third division whilst the visitors are fifth so it should be a tight game. Every game is tight at the elite level 🙂 

No lakeside animal action to report overnight. I guess they would have been avoiding the fireworks. Yes they have fireworks even in the wilderness surrounding the lake. People in isolated log cabins not wanting to miss out on all the fun. New Year’s Eve is not just for city dwellers yanow. The sky out there is free of light pollution. The stars themselves offer a spectacular alternative to fireworks and the show lasts a lot longer. And it is free.

This coming weekend the decorations are coming down. It already feels like a Sunday today but it ain’t, obvs. I shall move some of the boxes into the kitchen to facilitate easier de-decoration – a new word I have just invented. If someone else already thought of it all I can say is “how innovative”. We both invented it without even knowing what the other was up to. This word was made to be. 

2026 – the year we invented new words.

Someone would appear to have fixed our downstairs loo seat. At least it looks fixed. Didn’t try sitting on it. Must have been an offspring as it’s been loose for weeks and neither THG nor I have done anything about it. All good. I’ll find out who it was when they emerge from their caves later.

Today, as most of you will know, we commemorate Saint Thomas Becket. His stance in the defence of the right of the church against the monarchy should be an example to us all: “For the name of Jesus and the protection of the Church, I am ready to embrace death”. If I remember right. Some time ago now mind you. Time plays tricks on the memory and I didn’t hear it directly from the horse’s mouth so to speak. I wasn’t there when the dastardly deed was done. Difficult times.

Today is a sporting day in Lincoln. I am off to play golf in a simulator downtown. Not been before although I have used a simulator once before when at a conference in Arizona maybe thirty or so years ago. I imagine the tech has moved on since then. The next day @Huw Rees and I played a real golf course. The resort we were staying at had three courses and we called the pro shop to book a tee time. As the long evening went into the morning we kept calling them to push back the tee time further and further. The pro shop phone must have diverted to reception because there was no way they would have been open at that time of night.

Anyway when we eventually rocked up to play it turned out that we were the only ones there and had the run of all three courses. July is off season in Arizona due to the extreme heat. We randomly chose the middle course, loaded up the golf cart, including cold drinks and ice in the onboard fridge, and got going.

Now if you’ve never been to Arizona you need to know there is a lot of desert and said desert contains cacti, rattlesnakes, scorpions and other creatures designed to do you harm. Moreover this golf course had no rough. If your ball went off the fairway you were immediately in cactus and snake territory. There was no way we were going in there to look for our balls. Also the fairways were quite tight and our tee shots kept straying from the straight and narrow. The upshot was we had lost all our balls by the time we got to the ninth. I had stopped using a driver off the tee after the first in favour of the safer seven iron but it didn’t help. We packed it in and went back to the air conditioned bar to recuperate.

I doubt we will have this problem today and the bar is on site apaz which is unlikely to help the actual golf but we are really just there for the craic. Fore.

Feels a little odd being up this early at this time of year. Mind you it is the Feast of the Holy Innocents today so I daresay there is some in built instinct that says get up at five thirty, put on a coarse woollen shirt and walk barefoot to the top of a mountain to pray at a shrine. Something like that anyway. I could light the fire but I think I’d need to nip to the bottom of the garden to the wood store for some kindling and the fire will wait as it will be cold out :).

My grandmother used to get up every morning to sort out the fire which was kept burning most of the time. She had a fireplace where you could shut off the flow of air to slow the burn down overnight. V handy if the only source of heat for the house is a fire. She received free coal, being a miner’s widow.

It’s my turn to make the tea this morning anyway so being downstairs makes me handily placed to put the kettle on. Not yet though. Twirly. Had meant to stay up to watch Luke the Nuke last night but he didn’t come on until quite late so after the first leg I left Tom and THG to it and hit the hay.

The Davies family Christmas meal is today. We all appeared yesterday afternoon although Hannah and George got here first, dumped their gear and went straight to the pub. Reminds me of myself in my younger days going home to the Isle of Man at Christmas. Our local was The Crosby Hotel which was a mile and a half away from the house. The walk home from the pub was very dark once you left the main road. There was a country lane for half the walk where sometimes I had to keep to the middle of the road to feel the camber so that I knew I wasn’t about to fall into the ditch at the side. It was that dark. Long time ago now. These days we have Uber, though not in the Isle of Man I don’t think.

It’s a bit of a shame in a way that Uber has arrived in Lincoln as it has seriously affected the local taxi trade. Mind you you can usually get an uber even if you have to wait ten minutes but it used to be that if you hadn’t booked a taxi well in advance the chances of getting one to pick you up from a party in the wee small hours of the morning were pretty remote. I’ve noticed that very few taxi drivers are from Lincoln any more and I suspect hardly any Uber drivers. It means they don’t really know the town and rely on sat nav to get from A to B. Often means they take you on non optimal routes. In London I prefer a black cab to an Uber if the option is there. The black cab drivers know their way.

The Christmas meal will be served up this evening in a break from the usual Christmas Day format. This suits everyone. Half the occupants of the house are in training for the Seville Half which takes place next month so they will be off out running this morning as will THG who missed the park run this week because there isn’t one where we were in Wiltshire. It’s her hundredth park run coming up soon. I’m very proud of her.

Gotta go. The kettle doesn’t boil itself yanow?

The subject of handwriting letters came up. Because we mostly type these days our handwriting skills are disappearing. It takes me too long and hurts my hand after a while. I do however like the idea of sending people letters even though postage is expensive these days. Sending someone a Christmas card almost feels like you are flaunting your wealth. Typing a letter doesn’t feel the same. Not the same level of personalisation. Then I thought if I could type a letter in my own handwriting that might be a game changer. In other words have a font that looks like my handwriting. Gemini tells me such tools are available. 

Now a couple of things spring to mind. Printing out such a letter still doesn’t represent a show of effort to the recipient. Also it will almost certainly be easy to spot. Then there is the issue of whether such font will be legible. My handwriting has always been terrible. Finally google docs doesn’t let you upload custom fonts although I believe Microsoft word might. The other issue is whether anyone really cares anymore, in this age of instant communications.

Perhaps it’s time I moved on from that specific hangup. I still like the idea of sending letters though and will investigate the printing of envelopes on my printer. It is doable. Just that I’ve never done it. If I’m printing the letter I may as well print the envelope an all.

Today we move on from Holt and the Cookson abode back to the shire. We had a fox visit at 2:42am. Caught on the greenhouse cam. Will need to get back to check out the lake cam for any other visits. The wildlife has had free rein while we’ve been away.

…

Typically terrible traffic en route home. To be expected I guess. I took the brunt of it and now THG is in the driving seat for the downhill bit from Warwick. Bloody roadworks everywhere. There is a good reason why I take the train whenever I can. We stopped at some terrible services but at least it was some food inside us and let us stretch our legs. 

Chindian takeaway order for tonight:

Obvs someone changed their mind and decided against a chicken balti. I’m sharing a crispy duck starter with Tom and then having my usual beef curry fried rice.

Now queuing at the end of the M69 to get onto the M1. I’m not driving obvs. Gawd, it’s tedious.

I must say I do enjoy this cold weather. As long as you are properly wrapped up it is fine. The one caveat is that our gaff is single glazed and you can really tell the difference. We put new windows in our house a few years back which was a game changer.

This morning the entertainment on offer is a boules tournament on the village green. They had over 160 teams enter last year apaz. Four to a team. Everyone piles into the pub afterwards. We may leave the sport to the younger generation and get to the pub early :). Makes alorra sense to me.

My secret santa prezzie was a shipping forecast tshirt. Map of all the areas. Santa must be a Facebook friend because I’ve occasionally referred to the SF here as an aid to sleep during my recovery from hiphop2. Either that or a regular visitor to philosopherontap. I’m very pleased with the shirt and will wear it today together with my new thick flannel shirt (thank you THG) and my extremely warm Himalayan woolly pulley purchaysed from Black Yak at the Lincoln xmas market a few years ago. My coat is on this occasion my Irish tweed pea jacket, also v warm. Wrap up warm folks.

Our present opening time this year was a very restrained affair. Not the usual frenzy of flying wrapping paper. That happens on Sunday which is when the Davieses converge on their lincoln HQ. I am hoping for a socket set. Been a very good boy all year afaik.

As we were basking in the success of the secret Santa present giving the conversation turned, as oft the case at this time of year to frankincense and myrrh. I hadn’t realised that frankincense was in such short supply. In fact the world is said to be running out of the stuff (not fact checked this but let’s take it as read). On that basis might I suggest that an investment in frankincense stocks (geddit?) might yield good returns. Remember one does have to take a long view on this. These investments can take millenia to mature and this post should not be considered to constitute financial advice for which you should seek the advice of a qualified professional.

So now the cottage is a hive of activity as us occupants prepare to depart for the sport. All except me who is still sat on my arse ritin this. Better go. Ciao amigos.

…

Doh – sister Ann found the thermostat this pm. It was set to 16 degrees. Schoolboy error. It is now on 21 degrees. Much more comfortable!