where art collides philosoperontap

December 15, 2016

Staring down the barrel of a gun

Filed under: the art gallery — Trefor Davies @ 8:51 am

trust nobody

You think we live in a nice provincial town. Rarely get any trouble around here eh? Open your eyes. There are instruments of violence all around you. Even here in the bustling tourist heartland of the city known as the cathedral quarter it is possible to find yourself staring down the barrel of a gun. You need to think about what you might do in such situations. Here are a few pointers to get you started.

Trust no one and carry your own means of defense.
Watch your back
Avoid dark alleys
Carry a personal alarm
Carry a concealed gun or blade
Always move about in groups
Stick to well lit highways
Never get out of your car
Don’t live in Emurica
Attend martial arts classes

You have better go prepared. Don’t trust anyone. You could be in for a blade between the shoulders or a cannon ball between the eyebrows.

Happy Christmas from the philosopHerontap security team

Advisory note: Please make sure that any advice you follow is legal in your own jurisdiction. We wouldn’t want the forces of law and order deciding that society would be safer with you in the slammer.

Christmas Pub Quiz

Filed under: chinks — Tags: — Trefor Davies @ 8:22 am

at the West End Tap

The central heating has just kicked in. It must be 6.24am and nearly time to stick the kettle on. I woke up around 5am and took a look at my phone. Unfortunately it wasn’t on silent and loud video from last night started playing, waking Anne up. Feel bad about this. Hopefully she got back to sleep. I eventually came downstairs to do stuff.

We had a great night at the West End Tap Christmas Quiz. Our team, which had 8 people in it, only came fourth out of 6. I’m crap at pub quizzes. Anne drove which was most convenient. I sat at the bar next to Steve from Jazz Orbit and had a nice chat with him.

The road outside sounds quite busy. It’s amazing how many people are out and about at this time of day. A lot of people obviously start work early. Workers of the world unite. Up the revolution etc. I‘m glad we don’t live in the South East. Early starts are quite standard down there. It’s no life. People are trapped in the system. Afraid to break out from London.

I feel that if we were able to own a chunk of the allotments out the back we could convert them into a small holding. Keep a pig or two. Hens, ducks etc. The ultimate escape. It would be more of a hobby than anything we would rely on and we would have to be disciplined in getting the pigs slaughtered every year. We need to survive.  Actually that contradicts what I was saying about it being a hobby doesn’t it but you know what I mean. I’m not about to start getting sentimental about a pig. Especially when you know how much I like a bacon sandwich.

A thought for you. When I was a kid in Waunfawr I remember we always had to tip the milk bottle upside down before opening it to distribute the cream that had floated to the top. You also needed a stone or bit of slate to cover the milk bottles to stop birds from pecking at them to get at the cream. We don’t get that nowadays. Ok partly it’s because we are drinking semi-skimmed milk but I don’t think it happens even with full fat. Full fat must also be partly skimmed. I dunno.

Alistair is taking the kids to school this morning. They normally get the bus home on Thursdays and John goes straight to his saxophone lesson with Colin. Usually Anne or I then pick him up from Minster Yard in front of the Cathedral to save him having to walk home with his school bag and the sax, both of which are heavy. Today I am having lunch out with Adie. It’s Anne who is the normal luncher-outer. The point is at the time of writing I’m not sure whether Adie has managed to offload his picking up from school duties and therefore whether beer will be involved at lunchtime. If there is beer I won’t be picking up from the Cathedral.

This evening it is Steve Wildman’s leaving do. Again. It is becoming a traditional party. He isn’t leaving anywhere but it’s a good excuse for a party. At the Peacock. Got a a few bits to sort out this morning before the day is written off.

December 14, 2016

The three servers

Filed under: chinks,the art gallery — Trefor Davies @ 5:24 pm

at the castle cafe

Picture the scene. You walk into a cafe. There aren’t many in although it still looks a little crowded because some guy with a pram is blocking access to a chunk of space. I amble up to the small counter glancing sideways at the blackboard. It’s the usual stuff. Latte, flat white, cappuccino, teas of various flavours. I decide on a lah tay.

Behind the counter there are three members of staff, all looking smart is green aprons. I stand there. They stand there. This inanimate state continues for a few seconds. “Quite interesting” I think. I am a customer and they are paid to sell me stuff and,  having handed over my cash, deliver that which is now rightfully mine.

I wasn’t annoyed. Just bemused at the situation. I would quite happily have stood there for ten minutes not being served. The situation had artistic merit. In fact that is what it is. A living work of art. We all stand there, three of the participants being oblivious to the presence of the fourth despite the fact that they are staring right at him.

It was almost disappointing that all three eventually jolted themselves out of their reverie and the person nearest the till, presumably the most junior, took my order.  I moved into another, empty and more spacious room, with my lah tay and awaited a toasted tea cake. The mince pies weren’t ready yet.

a rare glimpse of what lies

Filed under: chinks — Tags: — Trefor Davies @ 5:07 pm

behind the hedge

My bread turned out well. White bloomer. Used it as part of a toasted bacon sandwich for breakfast. Last night was chatting to a chef at the Wright Vigar do. He had made the quarter finals of Masterchef a few years ago. Gave me some tims. Butter is definitely better than olive oil and fresh yeast is better than dried. So I’m going to up the amount of butter, I think I wasn’t using enough, and up the quantity of fresh yeast to 20g. Let’s see where that gets us. I’m trying to home in on the ideal recipe.

The Wright Vigar do was good as usual. Also as usual mostly populated with suits. I guess that’s the name of the game. Bankers, lawyers, solicitors etc. Clients too. Stayed for a few beers then went on to the Taphouse and Kitchen to meet Nige. After that ended up at the new Castle View curry house. It’s where Tito’s used to be and prior to that the Castlegate Indian. Have to say it’s a good start. Food was good. Will get the Christmas takeaway from there.

One year we had curry for Christmas Day. Except Anne and John who shared a turkey leg. Made a change. I picked it up the night before and reheated it on the day. It was surprisingly difficult to coordinate getting all the dishes hot enough. It was ok but we won’t do that again. It’s beef again this year as you know.

With 8 working days to go until Christmas there is now very little happening. Not that much happens anyway but now there is even less. Richard is coming up next Wednesday for our regular LONAP 121. Last one of the year.

Last night’s curry has certainly had after effects. I won’t elaborate. I’m now sat in the conservatory with the Dyson fan heater on. It is a bright day out there and I think I’ll go for a walk later on. Maybs check out a few bits and bobs for Crismus. Round the Bail perhaps.

Words. These are what come out when you stare long  enough at a page. If you stare long enough something just appears. That’s how it works. It’s a bit like a cricket match. You start off slowly, maybe scoring nothing for a long time and then gradually the runs come. Sometimes you play a blinder and the runs start to come at a fast rate and in great style. This is just the same as when you are writing.

Sometimes a piece of writing comes from an idea you have when you are nowhere near a computer (or notebook). If you can capture the idea at the time and revisit it that can result in some good words. If there is no means of capturing, or remembering, the idea is likely to be lost. How many great ideas have blown away in the wind like this?

I imagine Archimedes, when he was having his bath and shouted Eureka, had to get out of the bath straight away, pick up his chisel and start writing that word down. He would have had to be quick because he’d have got cold quite quickly having just stepped out of the water. Although it can be pretty warm in Greece in summer, if that was the time of year, so maybe he would have been ok. Perhaps he quickly got into a dressing gown before picking up his utensil.

During a cricket match an interruption can change everything. Break the flow. This can be the lunch break, tea or stumps at the end of the day. In the case of the modern day writer it is more likely to be a Facebook message interrupting the streaming of content. You stop to check out the message and are further distracted but other stuff in the timeline. It doesn’t have to be like this. You can disable notifications on your laptop but in my case a) I can’t be bothered and b) I’d have to look up how to do it.

I’ve never thought of cricket as being a metaphor for life. It probably isn’t a great model but we can pick and choose aspects of the game that fit the bill. The game ends in a win, lose or draw. That could reflect how an individual has lived his life or how lucky he or she has been. On the other hand it could mean nothing. We all die in the end. You know. Nothing or nobody is immortal. Even these words will get lost or destroyed. Will there be anyone around to read them? Will the language have changed so much that only niche academics will understand them? Questions questions. Have you considered the structure of sentences like that last one? Two repeated words but still a perfectly good sentence. Good grammatically. Not necessarily good subjectively.

Words are an interesting subject in their own right. Someone died recently. A well known journalist. The eulogies have flown thick and fast. What a great wordsmith. I didn’t like his stuff meself because I thought that he used complicated words for the sake of it. I’m more into using simple language. Discombobulation is not my game:). Simplicity doesn’t have to mean not as good as sophisticated or complicated. Simplicity is an art in itself. I’m gonna move on.

Leonard Cohen died recently. Lots of stuff was broadcast about him at the time. I hadn’t realised that he spent 10 years living simply on an island in Greece. His routine involved writing three pages of words in the mornings and then chillin out for the rest of the day. Maybe good. Maybe not. It’s a lot of time wasted. The rest of the day. Maybe it doesn’t matter.

Walked into the Bail and hand delivered a couple of christmas cards en route. Coffee in Lincoln castle cafe. Cafe dans the cafe du chateau. Oui. Not queit le meme.

In other news ever wondered what was behind that hedge. Well the featured image provides us with a tantalising glimpse of what lies beyond.

which came first

Filed under: the art gallery,thoughts — Trefor Davies @ 2:06 pm

post box or berries?

juxtaposition

Filed under: the art gallery — Trefor Davies @ 1:48 pm

or just posh garage?

juxtaposition

21st century

Filed under: the art gallery — Trefor Davies @ 8:46 am

communicator

December 13, 2016

The apple is still hanging on

Filed under: chinks — Tags: — Trefor Davies @ 2:16 pm

to dear life

Good kip. Woke up to hear that Trevor McCaskill the weather forecaster has died – yet another bit of bad news to add to the pile for 2016. We must surely be in for a bout of good news between now and new year. Maybe we will just switch off all sources of news. Trouble is people share these things on Facebook.

The consequence of a good kip is I wasn’t up before dawn to write the diary so that’s all you’re getting for now. Gotta go for a swim and need to get my stuff together.

Hardly anyone in the pool. Had the slow lane to myself until the last five minutes. People get in towards the end to arrive early for the over 50s swimfit class, or whatever it’s called.  Mostly very large ladies who spend their time chatting. Both men’s shower still cubicles managed to find themselves occupied though so I went in the communal shower. Only problem there is I don’t like to shave in the open shower. Not sure what people would think. So if you see me unshaven after being swimming you now know why.

Now I’m chewing my way through a bowl of fruit and fibre. Do have some jobs to do today. Gotta nip downtown to do some Christmas shopping. Maybe. Trouble is I can’t find the right thing online. Rewind. Rang the shop. They haven’t got it either. Ordered from Amazon with free Prime delivery.

Only 12 more days to go until Christmas yay. Had a Facebook video call with sister Ann in Holt and a chat with Dad. Cleaned the grate out and brought some more kindling in but probably won’t use it today as we are off out tonight. May not need it now until Sunday. It’s not cold.

There is no bread to make a sandwich for lunch. I am making some more but it won’t be ready in time. Still on its first rising. This time I’m using a Paul Hollywood recipe. Replaced a knob of butter with 40ml of olive oil and giving it a longer initial rise time. Let’s see if it makes a difference. This is something we have to crack:)

Outside we are heading into deepest winter. This isn’t snowbound icy wastes of winter. It is miserable neither here nor there insipid colours everything has stopped doing anything for winter winter. The evenings are the best bits at this time of year. Fire crackling in the grate. Welcoming lights inside the pub. Chinks of glasses etc. I see a small bird diving occasionally into our beech hedge. Assuming it nests there. It’s too fast for me to spot its plumage. We have had wrens, robins and hedge sparrows in there plus I suspect blackbirds. At least the bronze plumage of the hedge appies a bit of contrast to the insipid yellow green of the rest of the garden.

It’s 12.47 and it already feels darker out there. A gentle drizzle has started to brush the conservatory roof. It isn’t a drum it’s a brush. A very gentle tapping of the finger tips. I’m glad I’m not a wild animal. Ok they don’t know any different . I like the idea of popping out to the ub for a couple early doors. Wild animals don’t do that. They don’t play the piano or listen to jazz on Spotify. There are too many things that they don’t do so I won’t/can’t list them all. Pretty much everything really. What they tend to do is get eaten by other wild animals. It’s a wild animal eat wild animal world. A bit like being a human but totally different.

The lunch issue still needs resolving. I will need something inside me before heading to the Wright Vigar Christmas drinks reception at 5pm.

Like it or not this is a time of death and decay. The hedgehog that appeared dead on our front lawn is still there. At least physically. Mentally he has totally gone. Gone to the place where hedgehogs go when they die. I don’t expect any hedgehog has ever given it a thought. Otherwise we would see hedgehog religions all over the place. The unknown over why we are here and what happens when we die seems to be why most people turn to religion.

Meself I’m just riding a wave. Trying to stay balanced for as long as possible before being engulfed by boiling waves, dragged under and shipped out to sea for my limp, lifeless body to be torn apart by sharks in a short frenzied attack on just another piece of carrion. They know not what they are doing. Don’t waste that life. Learn to surf.

Wake up and smell the coffee, or some totally random and unrelated saying. What’s your favourite saying?

Check out the featured image of the same apple from only a few days ago.

December 12, 2016

choir of King’s College Cambridge

Filed under: chinks — Tags: — Trefor Davies @ 6:25 pm

crammed into our conservatory

The choir of King’s College Cambridge are singing away in the background. They are all crammed into our conservatory. It’s a professional performance despite the fact that there isn’t really room for them all to fit in. I hear Gloria in excelsis Deo. Religion has provided us with some wonderful music over the centuries. Time was when the church was the only outlet for creativity, be it painting or music. Contemporary carols are rubbish. In my view. If you are a Christian you will no doubt defend the genre out of loyalty to your religion but in reality they suck. So much so that you never hear them sung. Maybe there aren’t even any?

I’ve only got nineteen days left of writing this diary for 2016. After that it gets turned into a book. I’m not sure what I will do with the time after 31st December. I’ve grown so use to devoting the time to it. Reality is I need to start getting off my backside and being more active. Right now I’m sat on one of the sofas next to the fire. Not good enough really although Christmas is a time where people sit around a lot just eating and drinking. We aren’t quite there yet though. Twirly.

There is something that needs doing before the book can be compiled. The app I’ve identified needs a more recent version of php to work with. This means moving server. Hassle. Will have to decide what to do over the Christmas break. Might look at alternative apps.

The fire is a great companion. Who needs a TV when you can stare into the living flames. I think of the logs. Their purpose in life to grow and be slowly consumed by fire. Who’d be a tree? Anne is in the house somewhere. I haven’t seen her since she came back at lunchtime. That was two hours ago. Ours is a good sized house.

The choir has moved out to be replaced by a different one singing Handel’s Messiah. HWV 56. Was looking for the Huddersfield Chorale version but Spotify brings up some anonymous outfit. It is fine. We always had the Messiah playing at home at Christmas when we were kids. It is part of the Davies culture.

It’s a bit of a contrast being sat here in our front room listening to Handel compared with the intensive two days in London. You can only sustain that level of activity in short bursts. The house remains quiet this week but will begin to fill up come Saturday when Joe returns from Newcastle.

We have a tree. A 7 footer purchaysed from Fillingham. It’s erection in place in the tree stand was a piece of cake and it now awaits decoration from an expert. I don’t consider myself qualified in such arts. I’ve done my bit. I can now sit back and relax until it’s time to cook the Christmas Dinner.

I will have to get involved in putting up the lights and there needs to be an extension socket in place to cope with the number of illuminations that hopefully stiff work. That is of course skilled work and a task I accept responsibility for. My degree in Electronic Engineering qualifies me for this.

We are also converging on the menus for the Christmas period. Still needs some work but it’s fore rib of beef on Christmas day and gammon on Boxing Day. The beef has been ordered from Fosters. 3 ribs worth. 4 is overkill I think and 3 will be expensive enough. There is at least one day where we have a takeaway curry. Yay. I’m still looking for a curry buddy for tomorrow night after the Wright Vigar drinks.

weak sun

Filed under: chinks — Trefor Davies @ 12:47 pm

& Halcon Alturas 2014

Been a pleasant morning. Kicked off with a swim followed by fruit and fibre and a bit of toast for breakfast. Then Jackie Gordon arrived with the wine from their Halcon vineyard in California. 3 bottles of Alturas Syrah (95 score by Parker). Was really great to meet her again after what must be decades. I worked with Jackie at MEDL. We had an hour and a half chinwag before she set off back to Middlesbrough to see her parents.

After she had gone I lit the fire and settled down to send thank yous to the sponsors of last week’s workshop and Christmas bash. Also did some Netaxis stuff. Now it’s almost lunchtime and I’m spending some time updating this diary.

The sun was very weak in the sky driving back from the pool this morning and i had to pop out to the back garden to take some pic. Unusually it looks really large in the photos. I suspect this is just a trick of the light but odd nevertheless.

It is now raining and after picking John up from school we are off to buy the Christmas tree.

Halcon Alturas 2014

the milkman

Filed under: chinks — Tags: — Trefor Davies @ 6:15 am

never rings

I can tell you that today, Monday 12th December the milkman came at 05.33 because that is the time and he has just been. I can hear the scraping as the drops four pints off in the crate in the porch. He drives his milk float over from Newark. They shut the Lincoln dairy down a few years ago which is a shame. We continue the support them and get four pints every Monday and Friday. Normally top up with some milk from Tesco in the week but not always. Depends who is home.

I am sat in the living room because there is in my mind some residual heat from last night’s fire. Didn’t sleep particularly well. Wasn’t tired when I went to bed and kept waking up during the night. Going to go swimming later as I need to get back into the exercise routine.

Did a bit of a Waitrose shop yesterday afternoon. It was partly something to do but also doesn’t do any harm to get some of the Christmas stuff in. Got mostly non perishables such as cheese biscuits, crisps and chocolate etc. Have to say I gave in and bought a tin of Quality Street despite having told myself I wouldn’t since the bastards stopped including toffee delights in the mix. Left a message on their Facebook page telling them I wouldn’t be buying a tin this year for that very reason. A lot of people did the same. Won’t tell them I gave in. Problem is that it is traditional in the Davies house to have Quality Street at Christmas- since I was a very small child (yes that small).

We have a nice living room and we as a family don’t sit in it often enough. This is because the TV is in another room, the TV room. The room formerly known as my study. Yesterday John came in and sat with me because of the fire. That was nice. Then at some stage Anne came in to practice her saxophone wich drove me into the other room. It is very loud when you are in the same room. Still I’m proud of her that she is learning the instrument.

Today Jackie Gordon is swinging by with the wine. She ran out of time last week so is making a special trip this week which is good of her. Stayed with her brother in Leeds last night so she tells me. It breaks the back of the journey from Middlesborough.

My pork in cider casserole was a real hit yesterday. It is easy really. Slow cook with the right ingredients and you are there, the slow cook being the most important bit. Had it with roasted root vegetables. There is still one portion left plus three pork steaks I cut from the joint. They will have gone in the freezer. Afterwards I watched the second ever episode of Time Team on 4OD, the Father Ted Christmas Special and Planet Earth II with David Attenborough. Not a bad evening’s TV although two out of thee were repeats. Father TEd was competing with the X Factor so no competition. Who watches that crap?

The week ahead is easy enough. No real work although I will do some Netaxis stuff and may take a look at the LONAP budget for next year. There is the Wright Vigar Christmas Drinks party at the Cathedral Chapter House to look forward to on Tuesday night pus Steve Wildman’s leaving do on the Thursday at the Peacock. Steve ain’t leaving his job but he did establish this party as a tradition ten years or more ago. I’ve never been so am looking forward to it as it is apparently a good night.

The rest of the week is going to be spent getting ready for Christmas. We need to buy a tree. I got a lot of the decs down last night. I don’t get involved in the decorating. It used to be the domain of the kids but now it will be mostly Anne. My duties lie in getting the tree up. We will head out to Fillingham after school one day this week. Bought some Lindt tree chocolate decs yesterday at the Waitrose shop. There wasn’t much of a choice. I hope that tradition isn’t dying out. Not that I seem to get many of the chocs that get put on the tree. Such is the way of things.

Just noticed my VPN connection has stopped working and it won’t let me disconnect. Started up again now but it’s a bit odd that it won’t just let you cut it off. I have the VPN working all the time now. It probably won’t stop GCHQ from spying on me but it is at least a token attempt to retain some privacy. If they want to know what I’m up to they just have to read this diary and spy on my Facebook activity. It will be a waste of their time. I doubt they are spying on me but my issue is that one day someone will hack into a server somewhere and publish all these records that are being collected.

Anyway I don’t really like to talk about that sort of thing on this site. This is a happy place:) One where life is wonderful all the time.

I’ll be making the tea again this morning even though it isn’t my turn. Might as well seeing as I am already downstairs. I like making anne a cup of tea.

curtains

December 11, 2016

irresistible

Filed under: opinion — Trefor Davies @ 5:52 pm

irresistible

breakfast

Filed under: the art gallery — Trefor Davies @ 5:46 pm

perspectives

breakfast

home made pork scratchings

Filed under: the art gallery — Trefor Davies @ 4:25 pm

this pig did not die in vain

Dawn over Lincoln prison

Filed under: chinks — Tags: — Trefor Davies @ 10:04 am

all present and correct?

Interesting dawn light over Lincoln prison this morning:) Not the sort of place you associate with art or beauty. In fact art doesn’t have to be beautiful. The notion that those high walls are there to contain an evil concoction of badness is art in itself. We walk past in safety oblivious to the chain straining growling hounds within, volcanic red lava spewing from Satanic eyes, their gaze never leaving you.

Good morning all. A quiet day at home in prospect yay. I’m making a pork casserole for tonight’s tea. May even have a go at another loaf. Rather hoping there is still some baguette left from last night to service a bacon and mushroom roll for breakfast.

There was.

Now listening to Aled Jones on Classic FM. Stress free. Cup of tea steaming on the table next to me. Anne pottering around the kitchen. Some post arrives. The Post Office is working overtime in the run up to Christmas. Fair play. A shiver of relaxation runs between my shoulders and down my spine.

It is exactly two weeks until Christmas. The preparations are moving up a scale. Actually they aren’t. I’ve not really given it much thought other than gaining consensus that once more we will not be condoning the killing of a turkey but going for a bull instead. Probably sadder but that, my friends, is life. We are a carnivorous species. Omnivorous actually remembering that we like a bit of veg on the side of the plate.

I will be cooking Christmas dinner. This comes with a huge burden of responsibility, especially considering how much these large joints of beef cost. The beef has to be perfectly cooked. That means very much pink in the middle with even a hint of blood in there. The vegetables are of secondary importance but this shouldn’t be considered permission to not get them  right. The roast potatoes should be fluffy to the right degree and I think there will also be glazed parsnips and carrots involved. Maybe even parmesan coated parsnips a la Delia.

The gravy is another important factor in the success of the meal. Really with gravy it is just a question of getting the ingredients right. Poor quality ingredients results in a substandard sauce. On the other hand you can over do it and have too strong a taste. I’m sure you can understand the pressure here. Feel it even. I’m a fairly good gravy cook so I’m sure it will be ok.

The situation is complicated by the fact that champagne will have been involved. Too much champagne before lunch and the enjoyment of the food is diminished. Your staying power is affected. The ability to sustain consumption of wine and brandy until well after the meal has been finished and everyone slumps on a sofa in front of the fire.

Looking around me I reckon we have sofa capacity for everyone. That’s us six plus my sister Sue, Anne’s sister Sarah and dad. We are lucky to have a house large enough to lose a few people in it and therefore there is the space for folk to not get on top of each other. Quite often when calling John to the table I have to physically go upstairs to his room or the attic to fetch the lad. Especially if he has his headphones on and is involved in a campaign of global domination or some such activity. There will be mass murder involved. Or an innocent game of football. I may be doing him an injustice 🙂

This year I will have to step up the pace on my campaign to improve my bread making skills. It would be nice if we were able to rely on just using home made bread. This is something I can make a call on at the last minute. Very handy that I can just rustle up a loaf in the event that we run out of shop bought stuff anyway.

In other news there has been a bomb attack on a football stadium in Istanbul. Why does the world have to be so full of dangerous nutters?

Gotta go now. A pork casserole to make. Featured image is “dawn over Lincoln prison”.

Bugger. Overdid the par boiling of the spuds. The pork casserole however has turned out perfect. Mwaa mwaaaa.

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