I met a metal man,
His head was just a can,
Then I spied his wife,
Her finger was a knife,
I also saw their son,
His screws were all undone,
And when I pet the dog,
My hand scratched on a cog.
February 13, 2010
junkyard
February 12, 2010
My dad (Alun)
my dad (Alun)
who has lived long and intends longer
plays golf
of course
on his birthday which comes around faster
each time
battery charged
ready for another eighteen
with Eileen (my mam)
who takes the money
and puts it behind the clock on the proverbial
mantelpiece, which keeps going.
February 9, 2010
Used-To-Be
You’re time-expired, you’ve been retired, cold-shouldered from the job-scene,
you’re surplus to requirements, a sad, discarded has-been,
your use-by date has come and gone, you’re on the shelf from this point on,
you see yourself rejected, diminished and demeaned.
February 8, 2010
the cerse of vurse
terse
short verse
longer the poem
rhyme gets worse
struggling spelling
words need nurse
death of language
remove in hearse
see dave – I can do rhyme 🙂
February 7, 2010
The Curse of Verse
For some who choose to sip from the Spring of Hyppocrene
rhyming’s like a virus for which there’s no vaccine;
our poems read like excerpts from traditional pantomime
Beware you would-be wordsmiths, the curse of verse is rhyme
Rhyme’s merely ornamental, a sort of literary glue
fun when writing doggerel or limericks or clerihew
(more…)
February 3, 2010
disturbance of the peace
the dishwasher is on in the kitchen again. it is very relaxing. in the same category as photocopying but different.
the house is quiet – other than a debate going on upstairs regarding who has rights to the hot water from the immersion heater. unlike the water it isn’t a heated debate. more of a vocal eyebrow raise.
I can hear the bath running and the downstairs toilet flushing. outside it is raining though it is a silent rain.
then the peace is disturbed…
January 23, 2010
job lot of leeks
Anne bought a job lot of leeks, boy,
From a little chap down some dark alley.
He said, “These will last you for weeks, boy,
Since I’ve heard your Tref’s from the valley.”
But Trefor’s too posh for such things, boy –
He’s moved on to mangetout and zucchini
In his dreams that’s the food that anne brings boy
Served up whilst she wears her bikini
January 16, 2010
It pelts down and the unwary get wet.
It pelts down and the unwary get wet.
forty days and forty nights seem like an eternity
all hail Saint Swithin and all who sail in her
flood alerts fill the wet air waves
another notch on the windscreen wiper control
oh no a leak, fetch a bucket
(more…)
January 13, 2010
sad music
Sad music fills my head knowing you are gone.
My heart, once light with the carefree pleasures
of our younger days when your nature,
spirited, excited and challenged,
was pleased to soak in the sunshine of your ways,
now weighs me down, the shadows growing long.
My friend I cry, my grief, your suffering and pain,
the tears, unleashed, flow freely down my face.
Proud girl bowed, broken, driven to an end,
washed back into our consciousness,
into a deep and final sleep. But you should know
the memories that remain are of good times,
where your beauty prevailed,
your irreverent laughter filled our lives
and we lived like there was no tomorrow.
RIP Angharad Jones, 12th May 1962 to 9th January 2010
One of my favourite people.
December 30, 2009
sore throat
seriously large lumps of catarrrrrrrrh
coughs that reverberrrrrrate
cracccking ribs and
bending me double.
whisky and water, not really any help but
sounds good. probably needed
the hot lemon accompaniment.
the alcohol makes me wake up
in the night to go to the toilet.
in the morning I am tired and
still have the cough.
the Christmas excess 2009
4th December – Lincoln Christmas Market Friday – few pints in the Victoria, bag of chips on the way home, not too late
5th December – Saturday – party at our house, gawd knows what to eat and drink, plenty of singing and music
9th December – (my birthday) lunch with business partners at Belton Woods Hotel, Grantham, Tom’s parents evening at school followed by a few pints in the Morning Star and a takeaway Chinese at home
10th December – ITSPA awards, House of Commons followed by a few pints in the Red Lion and a Moroccan meal somewhere in London
11th December – first class Virgin Train to Liverpool – couple of free beers on the train followed by a couple more in the station bar at Lime Street.
12th December – family meal with Grandma and Grandad at the Dibbinsdale Hotel in Bromborough
15th December – Anne out
16th December – Timico management night out at Olive Branch in Clipsham – mega bender
17th December – Christmas concert at school
18th December – lunch with supplier in London Docklands – boys night out in Lincoln at night – Thai
19th December – out at Carol and Andy’s party
21st December – Pizza Express with Anne and the kids
22nd December – pint on the way home and wine with the meal
24th December – early doors at the Morning Star – it’s a tradition
25th December – Christmas Day!
26th December – Lizzie Slingsby’s traditional Boxing Day birthday bash – unlimited champagne! – out with Tom for early doors for his first legitimate pint on his 18th birthday. Back for steak and chips and a bottle of wine
27th December – down to Holt, Wiltshire for a family bash, champagne, G&T and wine
28th December – glass of red wine with cheese and Ryvita
29th December – quick pint with Robert to discuss Jeeps then off to the panto at the Theatre Royal with Cannon and Ball.
30th December – a beer in the Victoria on way home from work with Terry and the gang
31st December – more food, beer and wine!
1st January – musical afternoon at our house with Joe on trumpet, Ervin the Hungarian concert pianist and Steve on trombone.
2nd January – collapse trying to fit into clothes!
fat bastard
December 26, 2009
Lizzie
Oft mistook for a figurehead, Lizzie
walks tall despite her five foot something,
at the birthday bash, always a huge success
an annual event not to be missed,
friends gather to celebrate,
as they do each year, the homage on Boxing Day,
corks, deafening, pop and glasses sweetly ring,
the guests consume dutifully, and ease
themselves into another day of indulgence,
the old year merges seamlessly into the new.
or
When asked what it’s like to be Lizzie
She replied in a manner quite dizzy
On my birthday she said
It goes right to my head
This champagne that we drink is so fizzy.
December 18, 2009
Instruction
It’s over, not in the Dickie Bird sense.
Scrambling breathless to the white tape we are.
Of the conductors in the audience, how many are tired beyond their memory?
How many different levels are there of conducting? –
Daughters to brothers, brothers to sisters, brothers to brother.
And why should you stray from the xbox and instruct?
Unlike those who play the games, do the twittering, enjoy the deadness of arguing, YOU are a team.
Have a family break. Enjoy the mix. It’s not eternal.
December 15, 2009
Stockings
Soon my stocking will be full,
its just hanging empty at the mo,
I’ve slept a night and now its full to the brim,
So I’ll spend the morning opening them,
And thanking everyone for my pressies,
So now you know what a stockings for go and use yours!!!!!!!!
Its Christmas Everyone
Its so nearly Christmas,
I just can’t wait,
The present pile under the tree is growing,
There’s one for you and one for me,
Time flies by, its Christmas eve already,
Just one more sleep until…
ITS CHRISTMAS EVERYONE